Reality is slicker than the West Wing, and being good is dead-sexy (to me)…
So, a couple of days ago now we had our regular, 18-month dose of Burmese injustice and its accompanying day of paltry (but necessary and warranted), global media outcry as Nobel laureate, Aung San Suu Kyi was again sentenced to another 18-month term of house arrest in Yangon (Rangoon) by Myanmar’s ‘benevolent’, ruling military junta. It is a sad, sordid and ongoing tale that I needn’t illuminate (nor could my regurgitation do it the necessary justice) here. But, other than the added wrinkle of having this latest of her trials hastened by the bizarre incident of a night-swimming, trespassing American man’s foray onto her estate, the story remains the same. Justice for a brave, non-violent icon and the millions of long-suffering compatriots she suffers for and with, once again stifled by the power-lust of but a violent and evil few as the rest of us living in comfort faraway squirm and sympathize with a conciliatory day-or-so’s worth of rehashed horror and distant condemnation. A total farce. And one with sadly dire, real dimensions.
So much so, it’s easy to focus on the negatives.

Shepard Fairey's (of Obama/"Hope" poster fame) giving Suu Kyi the propa-graphic treatment
But even amidst this bleakness and the outrage I should feign as a proper world-citizen, I find myself strangely compelled by the Aung San Suu Kyi struggle for wholly different reasons. Not majority reasons by any stretch. And not simply the kick I get out of invoking the term junta liberally. But certainly a reason worth the hesitation of admission. Plainly put, I think Aung San Suu Kyi is rather sexy.
Is that wrong?
While admittedly and obviously odd, I wonder if it is a tad déclassé to remark on attractions (sexual and otherwise) towards political prisoners of unassailable, vintage righteousness? The whole ordeal (which I’ve suffered for some time now) further confounds me for my general tastes do not immediately run towards the feminine of my own loose, ethnic persuasion (Asian), nor do they often—if at all—encompass those decidedly senior to me. While I do recognize an extremely comforting and agreeable consistency to the beauty of Asian women (I am even proud of this fidelity and standard of cultural and biological craftsmanship), I did grow up around many, and there has always been a lacking for a reliable, case-by-case uniqueness that is (for better or worse) my libidinous wont. And though I would never in a million years discount a beauty that can come, sustain and/or improve with age, I rarely feel I would be moved to a point beyond issuing the odd claim that, “there goes one handsome woman.” Both these deplorably judgmental principles in concert should doubly disqualify Aung San Suu Kyi. And yet, I find her compellingly beautiful. Is it the floral bouquet worn in her long hair, out-of-style but suddenly in-style for its rarity; both classically elegant while simply and honestly resonant of a distinctly regional fashion vernacular? Is it that wonderfully articulate voice flavored by its high, Indian prep school English and offset in a sophisticated, non-regional tone from years of global conferences? Is it the climate and a dedicated pursuit of the lettered arts that allow skin to glow and age to suspend itself in the air? Could it be I just find goodness sexy?

At home with the world's most attractive dissident?
From projecting an external vanity onto public figures who probably eschew it, to a public figure that revels in it: Bill Clinton. Yeah, he’s still probably reaping-in positive sentiment (though, the red-colored flack is mounting) for his supposed, “off-the-reservation, cowboy heroics” in Pyongyang more than a week ago. And yes, to a definitive degree he deserves some credit (the mission worked, after all). But honestly, this was one slick, win-win political maneuver that (other than his consent and presence) he had little to do with. Some people get the satisfactory belt notch if they feel that’s what a novelty photo-op with a minute mad man, and a glitzy, stateside splash complete with effusive and grateful waterworks from a couple of liberated damsels who work for your old pal deserves. That’s cool. But others (should) get the satisfaction of pulling-off a real-life, only-in-John-Wells’s-wildest-West-Wing-dreams type operation. That sort of Jed Bartlettian cool should only really occur within the fantastical bounds of a televised hour of completely made-up television. Seriously.

Heads of State Date.
Okay. So you’ve got two nationals rather obviously detained within the world’s most secretive and impenetrable country. It’s run by a man who’s not playing with all his marbles but does command one of the world’s largest armies and takes a step closer to nuclear armament (if he isn’t already there) every day. It’s of the utmost, global importance that relations with this notoriously icy and isolated regime remain stable, if not vastly improved—and soon. But there is no popular support for open engagement because of alleged atrocities, and its simply a no-go in any manner to demonstrably consent to this regime’s outlandish behavior lest it open the door for widespread, international extortion. These two, poor hostages are suddenly symbolic pawns used to escalate a dangerous agenda, but with a rabid media back home are hyper-humanized with each 24-hour news hour blunting the intricate dimensions of the issue for a public that needs cut and dry bad guys. What do you do? What can you do?
Well you know this: the little emperor’s got some peculiar celebrity fetishes, and well, you’ve got a celebrity fetishist of sorts at your matrimonial disposal who also happens to be a person of (still) considerable political, representative heft. You know you can’t give any type of mission official blessing, so your envoy’s got to be non-official while still official in some way. A high profile, back-channel maneuver while a complete oxymoron, is really your only move. Get an independent, entertainment industry billionaire and a giant chemical conglomerate to bankroll your carefully selected candidate, and… BAM!
Not only is the rescue and the ability to refrain from having to make an official overture or suggest a new policy or approach a coup, the most impressive thing is that suddenly, you’ve opened-up some—however non-official—means of dialogue. Hell, you’ve even brought somebody back to the bargaining table without rather mercurial China making an international song and dance to carry-out your request. Like I said: slick. And serious proof that not only is the whole Hillary and Barack thing working-out rather well and tactfully, but that these two mo-fo’s aren’t messing around.

Someone else ain't messin' around either!




























